Who Shows Up for You Can Be Surprising

We all have our people, our loved ones. The friends and family that fill our thoughts and hearts. The ones who shows up in our time of need.

In hard times, these are the people who often are at the forefront, helping prop us up. They can also be the ones who dive in and do those tasks that need doing, when we can do little else but breathe.

These gorgeous souls are there for us, without us saying a word. Most of the time. Sometimes they are not. I am certain they never intentionally back away. However, I have discovered that they are not always there, when one really needs them. Not unless you specifically let them know that you are not managing.

During these most challenging of moments, when you are trying to tread water following trauma, some of our most beloved keep a healthy distance, for themselves. They are either not capable of giving anything of themselves at that point in time or they do not know how to.

This is very difficult to cope with, when one is already struggling to keep upright and functioning to some semblance of their former self. I say former self here, as I believe trauma changes us, to some degree. Feelings of being alone, when you really need those dearest, gain a stronghold.

With all that I have been experiencing in the past month, feelings of being alone have been prevalent. Some days, when I am coping a bit easier, the alone feeling is not so intense. Yet, when I am not managing well or a trigger has exploded inside me, those feelings increase in intensity.

Thankfully, I can reach out most of the time now. Not always, but most of the time. Thankfully, I have wonderful people reaching out to me too.

What happened to me, when I last wrote about the trauma and state I was in, was heart-warming and comforting. I had beautiful souls, who know me only from Mumma Sue’s View, reach out to me and offer support, kindness, caring and a willing ear. Consistent checking up on me, asking how I am doing, has followed.

For this, I am eternally grateful. I have made lovely friendships through Mumma Sue’s View and these have been solidified through their generosity of kindness, by being there for me. I was surprised, in a very pleasant way, by some who reached out to me. This touched my heart.

Who showed up for me on another particularly difficult day was a real surprise. And it happened by chance. As fate would have it, a neighbour who I am acquainted with, was coming out of our local shop when I was about to walk in. We exchanged greetings then a simple question from her, had me suggest we step outside.

What ensued was a long conversation with an intent listener, empathy, compassion and a very warm and sincere hug. Fate had guaranteed our paths crossed at that precise time on that day. This wonderful woman, stayed with me, listening and talking, whilst the rest of her family walked home. I did not feel alone in those moments and I was able to breathe.

I felt true understanding and genuine empathy and compassion emanate from her. In that moment, I had been provided with who I needed. The tears that welled in my eyes were from pure gratitude. We parted with her stating she would check in with me the following day and she was true to her word. I will never forget this.

Another gorgeous soul who shows up for me, across a vast distance, has done so via email. She reached out to me and over several days, we exchanged emails. I would give an update how I was doing, and I would receive words of support in return. At any given moment, I can send off an email to her and know that when she sees it, she will write back to me. I call her my friend across the miles.

Who shows up for me with consistency, from my usual circle, is not of a surprise. This does not devalue their support in any way. It affirms to me that I have the right people in my life. Their time, hugs, shoulder to cry on and knowing I can lean on them, is priceless.

What was surprising was how I needed to really emphasis that I needed support from some of my closest loved ones. Over the years, I believe that I have not been too demanding of their time or presence. I also believe that I am relatively understanding of all that they have going on in their full lives. Therefore, I was surprised when they didn’t just show up for me, in this time. I think now, I have come to understand why this was so. Thus, I harbor no ill-feeling; I now simply understand.

Who shows up for you, may not be who you would normally expect. There can be surprises thrown in and this can be uplifting and comforting.

Do I still feel alone? Yes, sometimes I do. Do I now know there are more people who shows up for me? Absolutely!

For those of you who have shown up for me, I am eternally grateful. I appreciate your presence, time, listening ear, consoling words, keeping in touch, being here for me and reminding me that although I may feel alone at times, I am not truly alone.

Thank you. Sincerely – thank you!

My previous post – You Just Never Know When You Will Feel Alone 

Who Shows Up

Image Credit – Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

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